| Love Left on the Wagon |
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| Hi, I'm song writer Mary Cates Respress. On April 6th, 1992, I discovered my husband (California) Respress had been killed and buried in an unmarked grave eight months earlier. At the time I received this tragic information I had moved away from my family and was living alone. After learning of the tragic circumstances surrounding the death of my husband I became deeply depressed and traumatized. I was grieved that he had no headstone and that for nearly a year I did not know of his death. The love I shared with him rose up in me and I cried almost every day and night for three years...(cont. below) |
| La Sisters Beauty Shop 390 Auburn Ave, Atlanta, Georgia |
| The only solace I found was when I flew home to Durham N.C. for a brief visit with my niece Ann who prayed with me. Her prayer words were so powerful I did not cry for three weeks afterwards. This was a big relief for me that I was completely oblivious to when the tears began again; lasting to the third year from when I was informed of my husband's tragic death. I cried so much the bags under my eyes looked like St. Nickolas bag of toys. If I had a dollar for every tear I've shed I would be a billionaire. I went to bed crying. I woke crying. I thought I would never stop crying. I knew no matter how much I cried it would not change what had happened to him. I prayed morning, noon, and night... |
| There were times I thought I would not survive my emotional pain that I would had died of a heart attack. I knew life and death is in the tongue, Proverbs 18:21. Understanding the power of the tongue I never spoke the words. I was afraid to give life to them, that they would take my life. I knew I had to persevere to keep my sanity and my life. At times I could not believe the tremendous pain I suffered. Many nights I cried out to God. "Please, God don't let me die with a broken heart" The pain was excruciating. There were times I could not remember one day from the other. All days were painful and long. This was the most miserable time of my life. I always hid my tears. I don't know how I managed not to cry in front of my customers in the beauty-shop where I worked... |
| When I could not take the pain no longer I prayed to God to send someone who had experienced a trauma similar to mine. I knew to stop my crying I needed someone to talk with who could tell me how to cope with my problem. No one came. I was so lonely and miserable I began talking about it to everyone I met including my customers. I began singing songs to myself that comforted me. I discovered talking and singing was good therapy for me. I discovered also I was adding words and tunes of my own to the songs I sang. Then I began to talk to God about it. "Yes." October 23, 1992 I began writing a story about my tragic experience, entitled WHAT THE WIFE DIDN'T KNOW. Word by word I shared my grief and sorrow. This was a very bizarre experience for me. Though I knew the writing and song were a comfort to me I was not sure my grief and sorrows would be of interest to anyone else. I prayed that my songs and story would help someone with a broken and lonely heart to find comfort in my words and songs as I had found comfort in them. |
| Contact: Love Left on the Wagon Here: Email: maryrespress@yahoo.com Web: www.cbpm.org/loveleftonthewagon |
| "Love Left on the Wagon" This song is my baby when I hear the lyrics to this song it helps me to heal. When love is gone it's a sad situation, but we must go on with our lives. When I hear this song, I feel as if I'm looking in the mirror. This song is medicine to my spirit. "California had my poor, poor heart in the palm of his right hand and I didn't have a chance to get it back before he left. I long for him in my dreams. Sometimes his spirit comes to me in disguise, but I always know its my darling husband. If I live to be 103, I believe I'll still long for him. To me love is a circle that never ends |
| RESPRESS MAKES PLEA Song writer Mary Cates Respress would like to make a humble plea to ask everyone, please, please, stop burying your loved-ones without graves markers and destroying cemeteries. It breaks my poor poor, heart to see graves desecrates and unmarked. I beg you, please help me on my crusade against this mockery. Remember, "We all are Kings and Queens". Thank you so very much, Songwriter, Mary Cates Respress |
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